the game from hell

I feel like I'm constantly playing a game. When I want to go out, I can't. Why? Because when it seems like the worst is happening the game turns around and sucks me back in. It's hard and difficult to understand. It's a never ending kinda game. Rules are unfair, but I'm hooked. The game has a weird way of giving me points or letting me proceed. I may fall back three spaces, but I draw another card and the game lets me go forward ten spaces. I'm so confused. It's like the game is scared for me to leave or lose or even win. I'm in a constant state of paranormal. I have tried so many times to quit this game, but somehow the moment I draw another card, or roll a dice, I don't want to leave. I guess you can say I'm a little bit addicted. But this game, damn. You have to admit that this game, even though it isn't "real" it plays well. It knows when to push my limits, and when to grab me back in. It's smart. It knows when it's going too far. Sometimes I wonder if I'll be happier not playing this game. I have been bending backwards to please this game. I want to break it, destroy it, crush it. But sometimes I think that this game is worth it. Maybe I'll win a prize. I realize, I make a lot of excuses for this game. I should stop. I hate to say this, but I'm not done with this game. It's not over, and I know it. And when I think it's over, it's not. I want to control the game. I don't want the game to control me. I want to manipulate. I want to conqueror. The game will go down.